I can't be sure that this state of mind is not of my own design

This isn't really one of those "WOW! Look what I did this weekend" blogs, it's more like what I have come to recognize as the good, the bad and the ugly/are they out of their minds moments in Spain... thus far. 

Let's start this out on a good note, with the pleasantries of Spanish life:

1. Coca-light. I've tried time and time again to break myself of my pop-consuming habit, and I was getting pretty good in the states, but there's just no hope when Coca-light comes into the picture. It's the european version of Diet Coke, but there's just something different, something oh so sexy about it. And when you're a person who doesn't drink coffee or beer, it's the best of all alternatives when meeting friends at a cafe. 
   
2. Parks. So this one might come as a shocker, because anyone who knows me at all knows that I will do anything to avoid going outdoors, but Sevilla has cracked my hard exterior. There are so many beautiful parks, with benches and fountains and gardens, oh my! The trees know just how to bend to allow the right amount of sunlight in, yet they congregate at just the right time along the walking path to give you a little taste of cool shade. And the leaves... they just dance. 
   
3. Eggs. I love them! I love them anyway you want to give them to me - and Spaniards love them too!!! My house mom always sneaks hard boiled or fried eggs into our soup, sometimes she'll serve it as a side with meat, sometimes it's a whole vat of eggs in the form of tortilla... it's just egg heaven. I'm getting a lot of ideas for cooking when I get home. 
   
4. Smells. Well, sometimes it's not so good, like any spot can be... but when it's good, it's sooo sooooo good. Here are some of the favorites: fresh bread and croissants from the panderias or cafes; garlic anything - but especially rice; the orange blossoms blooming along every street; the sun? Ok, that one sounds kind of weird... but you all know when you've been outside all day or along for a walk and you get inside and your clothes just smell... warm. Sunkissed. That's it. 
   
5. Chuchis. Candy stands are referred to as Chucherias here, so I'm sure I don't have the right name for them... but what I call chuchis are little pieces of hybrid heaven - a cross between licorice and starbursts. My favorites are the generic brand you can get in packages at the grocery, but I would never turn down the GIANT chuchis of different flavors - watermelon, bubble gum, raspberry, cherry... PURE LOVE - ALL OF THEM. 
   
6. I love not having to cook meals. I'm lazy. 
   
7. (Some) Spanish men. So sometimes, when I'm walking down the street or sitting at a cafe, I inevitably see good looking guys. I know there's this great, romanticized image of a sexy Spaniard - tall, dark, handsome, suave - well, it's true... there are some of those. But then there are some others who just put even the most perfect image to shame. I mean, today I was stopped at a crosswalk and this man got out of his car. He was wearing a plain v-neck teeshirt and fitted jeans - so nothing special... but I'm pretty sure he saw my mouth drop open and my head cock to the side. I mean I was amazed by his beauty. He just reeked of charisma... and manliness. I want one. 
   
8. Twilight. The temperature is always perfect. The air always has the slightest breeze and it picks up every pleasant smell that the day created. If you can find the right spot, no one will be out to bother you, and you can just walk for hours. You can think. You can relax.  The nighttime just facilitates reflection. 
   
9. Croquetas. The godfather of all tapas, in my opinion. Croquetas are small fried rolls made with this type of thick cream substance that basically simulates creamy mashed potatoes. I've had them with spinach and ham, but you can put any kind of meat in them... and they are just amazing. I always want to shove them in my mouth, like sushi, but then I realize that rushing the perfection that is the would be an insult to all things yummy. 
   
10. Dogs. There are so many cute puppies all around! They're so well behaved that they are rarely ever on a leash and I just want to cuddle with them all
    
11. Little boys. That didn't sound creepy? What I meant by that is that all the little boys are dressed in short-short overalls and knee highs until the age of 5. It's not uncommon - it's adorable - and so pleasantly old fashioned that it almost makes me want to have a baby of my own to dress. Ha - let's not get ahead of ourselves. 
    

Things that make my eyes twitch, my temperature rise and my patience wear thin:

1. My house mom. She is a really nice woman - she's never done anything out of line or said anything that was offensive or invasive, but there's just something about her that frustrates me so much. So has to question evvvvvverything I do. Like the other day she asked why I hadn't been eating as much. Because I'm gaining weight. Why do you have your bag packed? Because I'm going to the gym before class. The gym? Why? Because I don't want to gain weight. I'm going to Morocco this weekend. Morocco, why would you go there? EVERYTHING HAS TO BE FOLLOWED WITH WHY. WHHHHHHHHHHYYYYYYYYYYY.
   
2. Our cleaning lady. She comes every Friday morning. I came to realize that it's necessary to pre-clean the room before she cleans it. So every Friday I shove all my stuff in the closet so she doesn't touch/drop/move anything important... she doesn't even clean the room? There's still dust everywhere, the floor never gets swept, the mirror is dirty... and the other day she was cleaning the bathroom and she took the no-slip mat out of the tub and DRAPED IT OVER OUR CLEAN HAND TOWELS. Disgusting. I would rather clean my own space because I think she's crazy and senseless. 
3. Spanish manners. Or should I say the lack-thereof. They stare. The run into you on the sidewalk. They refuse to move. They never say excuse me. They never say thank you or bless you. They are just flat out rude. I decided that if I were going to make eye contact with anyone on the street anymore, it would only be to give the stink eye. So far it's worked. And I also decided to use the best defense weapon God gave me - my elbows. I can play that game too - I have checked 4 women with my elbow and/or bag this week alone. Each hit feels like a bullseye too! I will say that today I was walking home from school and this spanish woman smiled at me. That meant everything to me. I play and joke and make light of the situation, but it's exhausting being around such unhappy people all the time. Sometimes you need that smile. 
4. Smokers. Lord, they're everywhere. I can't go into a bar or restaurant for 3 minutes without smelling like an ashtray. And they start out so early in the morning - makes me nauseous when I'm walking to school
   
5. Bars/Clubs. I hate them. I hate going out. I hate people who try to make me go out or try to make me feel guilty for going out. I am low key and can't help it. But apparently "I'm in Spain!" and that's what you're supposed to do. No... I do what I do, thanks. 
   
6. Toilet still stalls. Shower door still lets cold air in. 
   
7. The Spanish grading system. I just don't get it. Like I got my grammar exam back the other day and there were four numbers at the top - then below I had the number 9 circled. My professor told me this was two grades, both out of ten. Everyone else had weird numbers like 9.22 and 7.16... why did I only have one and WHAT DOES THAT MEAN?!
   
8. Waiters. Getting anyone's attention in a restaurant is like pulling teeth. Wait to be sat. Wait for someone to notice you. Wait to order a drink. Drink your drink. Wait to order food. Wait forever for your food. Wait to get someone's attention for the bill. Wait as you try to figure out how to split the bill because no one is clever enough to realize that people don't always want to pay together. Wait for change. Get so frustrated about the time, forget the tip and leave! There is no such thing as quick and casual. 
   
9. The outlets. There are two different sizes and my appliances don't fit in the smaller one - which seems to be around more frequently. And, there's only one outlet in my room which is no where near the mirror. Mornings are quite hectic when getting ready. 
   
10. The language. People speak so fast... and everyday I'm getting better at actually understanding or piecing together what is being spoken to me. But obviously, I don't understand everything... and when I ask someone to repeat something, they take that as me not being able to speak spanish. So they address me in english. I keep trying to speak in spanish, but they're not having it. So pretty soon I just get frustrated and walk away. This always happens to me in bars/clubs/loud environments where people are retarded enough to think that you should be able to have a conversation over the noise anyways. Geez. 
    
11. Salads... still. We've moved on from the olive oil problem, but now it's bigger and better things. They like to pile tomatoes, onions and dry tuna on the salads - three things which make me queezy when eaten at the wrong time or with the wrong dose. I've tried to scrape it all off and just eat the lettuce, but alas, the whole idea is nearly ruined for me now. 
    

Things that just make me ask myself, "really?"

1. Spaniards like to park any and everywhere. They also like to leave their cars in neutral so that if someone else needs a parking spot, they can get out of their car and push the other car out of the way. I've seen this done a number of times. 
   
2. It's approaching 80 degrees and people are still dressed in layers - jackets, sweaters, scarfs and boots. I know you sweat - don't try to tell me otherwise. 
   
3. Medicine? So last week the plague hit my house and my house mom, house sister, roommate and myself were all throwing up and pooping ourselves sideways. Instead of going to the doctor and getting medicine - my house mom decided to rely on what seemed to me to be real backwards, counterproductive home remedies. Example: taking pills for a headache for every symptom; drinking lemon water until you can't stand it; eating nothing until you are near death,  at which point you are to eat yogurt and toast- no butter anywhere near! When you're well enough to eat real meals, eat fish... because we all know how fish settles an upset stomach. I mean come on woman! Go to the pharmacy and get some pepto bismol and vernors! I don't have a license to practice medicine, but I can tell you in a heart beat that none of that stuff works or makes you temporarily feel better!
   
4. Mold. We keep putting the jam in the fridge after breakfast, our house mom keeps taking it back out. She likes to refill the jars when they get low, without rotating the jam or washing the containers. There is a fresh layer of mold or at least a few spots everyday. I don't get down like that. 
   
5. Mothers. Women have babies here at the same ages as in the States, but they must have a super quick rebound period... because they're walking around with their strollers and baby slings and newborns - in the latest fashions, the highest of high heels and with the best hair you've ever seen. Is that what it takes?
   
6. Incense. There are pockets allllll over the city where people sell and burn it - but it's always the same kind and always so strong. Isn't variety supposed to be the spice of life?
   
7. Why are grapes sooooo freaking expensive?!!!!!
   
8. There are no pre-mixed desserts in the stores. No Duncan, no Betty, no Doughboy. There goes cheap entertainment. 
   

That's about it for now... thanks for sticking to it and reading my rant all the way through. This weekend I'm going to Barcelona, and then it's almost time for Spring Break. 

I'm trying to renew my attitude for the rest of my time here, and really take everything in. I'm having a wonderful experience, and I love this opportunity... but it goes without being said that I miss you all terribly. I'm such a house cat :(